She walks into the room, and though it is crowded, you spot her immediately. She is just that kind of woman. She grabs your attention from the get go. She’s got it all! Your eyes slowly take her in, from top to bottom, and you follow her every move. You begin to google her mentally. Dress: Dolce & Gabbana, hair: definitely George Caroll , make-up: Alexis Vogel herself, shoes: Prada, accessories: had to be Gucci and Luis Vuitton, perfume: can’t smell it from so far, but you are guessing it’s Coco Channel. At the end of your mental search, your mind is going wild, your heart beating fast, you are silently screaming inside, “Oh no! She’s out of my league!” She is everything you have ever wanted to be, and so much more. You tell yourself that there’s no point in even competing, she beat you long before the race ever began.
And so, you move to plan B. You take your eyes off her for a second, just long enough for you to spot your group of friends having a chat in the corner. These are your girls! They are certainly in your league. You approach them, all fired up. You interrupt their conversation abruptly, clicking your tongue, “She thinks she’s something!” And then, it all begins. You begin laughing at the way she spilled her drink, enjoying how she stumbled and almost fell in her fancy Prada shoes, disappointed that she didn’t make it all the way down. You spend your whole evening, knocking her. And, by the time you notice it, it’s already time to go home, and your plan has worked! You are no longer feeling so bad about yourself, because you have found so many mistakes in her, which have brought her tumbling from her high horse, all the way down to your level. You exit, feeling good about yourself, thinking that you are not so bad after all!
Well, that is one way of dealing with it. That is certainly how many women behave when they feel threatened, or feel like they do not measure up. I, on the other hand, say it’s the wrong way of dealing with it. Why knock her, if you can join her? You wait until the time is ideal, and then you make your move. Your palms sweat as you approach her, your mind is not coherent enough to formulate intelligent thoughts. You just know that you are going to make a fool of yourself, but you keep going anyway, until you get to her. You pause just long enough to notice that you were right, her perfume is Coco Channel. And, you say hello. In the beginning, the conversation is strained. You both don’t know what to say to each other. But you give it your best. In the middle of the evening, you’ve both found a comfortable corner where you can sit and chat, and your ball is rolling. You exchange views about raising kids, compare notes on marriage and your faith and you even manage to thrown in ideas about your careers. And by the time you notice it, it’s already time to go home, and your plan has worked! You exit feeling good about yourself, thinking that you are not so bad after all.
Dear friend, we all have such kind of women in our lives – women who are our role models, be it at work, around our neighbourhood, at church, at our kids’ school, they are everywhere. We look up to these women and we secretly wish we could be the woman they are. I love to break it to you; you will never be who she is! She is one of a kind. Fortunately for you and me, our God is such a creative designer, that He doesn’t do knock-offs! The only woman you can be is yourself. Now, you can waste time shying away from your role models, keeping your distance, or even going as low as to knock them down. Or, you can approach them, get to know them better, find out what makes them so successful, what it is about them that makes them stand out so much, and more importantly, you can allow them get to know you. Then, you just might be surprised by how much you can not only learn from them, but can TEACH them as well. That’s right! You were created to contribute your uniqueness to this world. You were not meant to be a carbon copy of someone else. Come out of your shell. You’ve hid long enough! Don’t bury yourself so deep within yourself that you end up getting lost to the world. Then maybe, just maybe, this is how your story will end...
After your long chat in the corner, you realize that it’s time to go home. You’re excited because you have made a new friend, and you are thinking that you are not so bad after all. As you make your way to the exit, her eyes follow you to the door, because you are just that kind of woman! You’ve got it all! She takes you all in, while silently, inside her, she screams, “Oh no! She’s out of my league!”